Friday, March 6, 2009

The Intervention

Today I drove to Dallas to meet my brother Eric at his brother-in-law's dental office. He was fitting me for a new flipper (AKA tooth-like retainer, until the permanent tooth gets installed in MAY) while he was in town for the weekend.

I have HillbillyBob teeth. It's embarrassing. It's like dentures falling out of my mouth when I eat. Sooooooooo attractive! No, I'm not posting a pic. You're very welcome.

As I'm driving home, I got a text from my sister, Kim. "What are you on?"

My response - "Huh?" As I'm thinking to myself - I'm on I35 driving South, but why does she care?

Kim immediately wrote back - "I heard you're acting like you're on drugs."

Me - "How? LOL." I thought she was kidding.

Again, Kim - "So, what are you on?"


I have no idea what she's talking about, so I called her. I asked her what she meant. She said she was online with Jared, and he asked her if she had talked to me today. She said "no, why?"

He said because I'm acting really happy, and strange, and saying stuff like I'm on drugs. WHAT?? I still have no clue.

I called Jared. (Kim is still on the phone - we have a 3-way phone call going now. Gotta get to the bottom of this.)

"Jared, why are you spreading rumors that I'm on drugs? I talked to you 3 times today to help you with your iMovie - I wasn't being weird, or acting overly happy!! What are you talking about??"

He just kept saying I was being weird. Saying strange things. He asked if I saw the video he did of Tyson on his blog.

SOOOOOO confused, I said, "Jared, I'm still driving - how could I see your video yet?"

It didn't sink in with him right away that I was driving back from Dallas. I've been in the car ALL THE LIVE LONG DAY.

FINALLY, a light turns on. Ah Ha!

My children were at home after school. Morgan was babysitting. After the kids' chores are done, they're allowed to play the computer. Sydney and Travis like to get on mine and pretend they're ME and chat with Del. He always has to ask questions to make sure it's me first. Jared had been talking to Travis and Sydney!! They each pretended to be me at different times. Jared asked who he was talking to, and Syd wrote back, "Kris" So he asked if I still had a migraine from yesterday, and she said, "no." He asked if I was still on the drugs though, and she wrote back, "YEAH!!" (No, I'm not!)

Jared let's out a sigh, "Oooooooh - it makes so much more sense now." He was quiet a second and then said, "I think I might've cussed on it too - I think I said, 'what the hell are you talking about?'" NICE, Uncle Jared.

Sydney told me tonight that Jared asked if I was drunk. And her response to him was, "No, I'm sobar." Then said she also accepted a video chat, and then she ducked under the desk so he couldn't see her. LOL!! So stinkin' funny! I can see why he might've thought I was on drugs. Kim, Jared and I laughed pretty good.

WARNING - if anybody tries to ichat, instant message, or video chat, please make sure to ask detailed questions first to verify buddy identity.

So much for the intervention.
Case closed.



Addendum - Jared saved the iChats. I'm so glad! He says you can SEE the confusion.

So funny - Sydney's pretty good. (she was just trying to be funny, I promise she doesn't usually call names. Usually..... I think..... I hope.

3/6/09 4:38 PM

Kristin - Yo
Jared - wuzzup
Kristin - Watcha doin?
Jared - figgering
Kristin - okay.....
Kristin - idiot!
Jared - huh?
Kristin - nothin
Jared - you're crazy
Kristin - no you are dummy!
Jared - who is this?
Kristin - Kris
Jared - you need to say three nice things about me. preferably about my looks
Kristin - okay, lets get started ............. o.k. I cant think of anything
Jared - so mean
Kristin - thanks!
Jared - what are you smoking right now?
Kristin - nothin
Jared - are you sure?
Kristin - im just in a good mood.
Jared - awesome, why are you calling me names then?
Kristin - dont know. mabey cause youre my little bro
Jared - ok then
Kristin - so why are we doin this?
Jared - what the hell are you talking about?
Jared - lol
Kristin - why are we doin ichat?
Jared - well, i tried to initiate a video chat, but got denied
Kristin - ok
Kristin - what do you want me to do about it

Jared - well, i figured you denied me because you're not sober, so i guess I'll wait till you are
Kristin - what does sober mean again , I forgot?
Jared - not drunk
Jared - not inebriated
Kristin - Oh yeah
Jared - not sure if i spelled that last one correctly
Kristin - ok
Jared - i need some help, this is driving me crazy
Kristin - so watcha doin?
Jared - seriously, what are you smoking?
Kristin - nothing! But, I think i am drunk
Jared - me too!
Jared - me think you drunk
Kristin - LOL!
Jared - go to my blog
Kristin - OK
Jared - RIGHT NOW!!!!!
Kristin - O.K.!!!!
Jared - wait, i want to watch you watch it
Jared - JERK!!!!! (Sydney denied the video chat)
Kristin - EVIL!!!!!
Jared - EVIL JERK!!!!
Kristin - EVIL, EVIL JERH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Kristin - OOOOOOPPPPSSS!!!!!!!!!!!
Kristin - I MEANT JERK

Jared - are you having a migraine?
Kristin - NOT ANYMORE
Jared - are you still taking the drugs for it?
Kristin - YEAH
Jared - no wonder
Kristin - Whats your blog called again?
Jared - jwmack.blogspot.com
Kristin - thanks!
Kristin - OK IM ON. NOW WHAT?
Jared - now let me watch your reaction
Jared - punk!!!! (Sydney denied the video chat again.)



I think this part was Travis -

3/6/09 5:06 PM
Kristin - When ever you patted Tyson's cheek he laughed. Hillairious!!!!!!!
Jared - i know
Kristin - LOL
Kristin - Oh, and you're a big fat punk!!!!!!!!!

Jared - huh?
Kristin - YOU CALLED ME A PUNK remember?
Jared - you're dilerious
Kristin - i know
Kristin - Oh, go on google and look up "Gummie Bear Song".
Kristin - I dont know why but its funny!

Jared - anything's funny to you right now
Kristin - NO!!!!!!! just do it!
Jared - ok, it was funny
Jared - but not hysterical
Kristin - Did you like it a lot?
Kristin - The but was pretty!

Jared - the butt was, but i don't know about the other but

I still can't believe he thought it was ME. I do NOT call him names, I know how to spell, and I always use capital letters where I should and punctuation marks. Always.

9 comments:

Jared said...

After reading this a couple times, of course it seems obvious that I'm speaking with some kids. But I still think that it's not too far off from sounding like Kristin, j/k. I guess when I asked who I was talking to and they responded "Kris" I wasn't thinking they'd be lying to me. I guess now I know. Kind of makes me wonder how many other conversations I've had with "Kris." Good one Travis and Sydney - you got me. From now on I need to have a code word with Kristin so I know it's actually her. Maybe I could ask her how oxidative phosphorylation works, or what causes osteoradionecrosis... no, those won't work.

Adam said...

I think it's hilarious that two adolescents totally punk'd Dr. Jared Mack, and he had no idea what hit him. Thanks for the laugh Jared.

Karen said...

Hilarious conversation - Yes Jared, they got you. I would have been suspicious with all the misspelled words. Mom

Sparkle Mama said...

LOL- your kids are a hoot... I wonder were they get there silly trickster ways from? Hmmmmmm- YOU maybe!

Unknown said...

This is my FAVORITE part:

JARED - you need to say three nice things about me. preferably about my looks

KRISTIN - okay, lets get started ...........o.k. I cant think of anything

I don't think she was trying to be funny, but that was such a good one!!

Jared said...

That was definitely one of my favorite parts, too. I laughed really hard when I read that the first time. I also liked the part where I swore - I was so confused. I wasn't really focussing on the punctuation and spelling errors - I was busy doing something else so I'd glance at was said and try to figure out why the conversation was so disjointed. I think if Kristin ever was drunk, she'd act just like her kids.

Jordan and Luci said...

I liked the swearing part too. I'm still laughing. I love it!

Ken said...

Can you do a show n' tell next time we are all together about your billy bob teeth. I think we need to all experience this in order to truly become "family". Haha!

Unknown said...

I STILL laugh at these conversations. They're fun to read.